Archives For High School

Hiring a Tutor versus Do it Yourself

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Courtesy of Official US Navy Imagery via Creative Commons.

Have you ever been stumped by your child? Did they bring home some work from school that you just could not help with? Do they ask questions about a subject out of curiosity? Or, has your child fallen behind in a subject? Are you frustrated because you don’t know how to help them catch up? Maybe you just aren’t wired to be a teacher. If any of these sound familiar, your child might need a tutor.

I consider myself a pretty good student. I did well in school and am fairly well-rounded. But, both of my boys have had homework that I couldn’t help with. There were phrases that I’ve never heard. Ways to do things that I had never seen. Concepts that were foreign to me. I know it will happen with my daughter too.

I managed to stumble through and learn enough to help my boys. Either I read through the book or looked it up on the internet, but together we found the answers. In some cases it was very tough. I’ve not had to hire a tutor, but perhaps you will.

If any of the following apply to your child, they will need some help whether from you or a tutor.

Your child is struggling. They have fallen behind and they try hard, but don’t seem to get it. Their frustrations are growing. You sense that they want to do better.

Your child wants to know more. Maybe your child is gifted and has a natural curiosity. You would like to help them but your knowledge on the subject is limited. A tutor that specializes in a subject area may be the way to go.

Your child’s teacher recommends some extra help. There is no better gauge on your child’s needs than their teacher. They know when a tutor would help because it’s their job. Don’t dismiss this recommendation.

In the following situations, it’s probably better to hire a tutor.

Your child is preparing to take an entrance exam. This is one area where I definitely recommend tutoring help. These specialists understand the test so they know how to help your child manage the test. They can also identify weaknesses through practice exam and pinpoint improvement areas.

You simply don’t know how to help. If you feel like you’ll be in over your head, then trying to learn the topic may be ineffective. Or, maybe you just don’t have the background to learn the subject well. In this case, find a tutor.

You lack the patience to help. It happens. Some of us just aren’t wired for the traditional homework model. We all have different learning styles, so if you find yourself getting agitated or frustrated, stop and hire a tutor. Just don’t use this as an excuse not to engage with your child.

Your child gets frustrated when you help them. Sometimes our children cannot separate the parent role from the tutor role. If they argue that maybe you aren’t doing it right, then this is a sign you could need outside help. Your help may do more harm than good. Instead of creating stress, hire a tutor.

However, here are some times when a tutor may not be the way to go. In these cases, you can teach the child yourself or look for creative solutions, mentioned below.

Cost is an issue. Look for a high-school or college student instead of an adult. Or, maybe you have services that you can trade, like babysitting for tutoring help. Look for alternative means of payment.

No quality tutors are available locally. Always ask teachers for recommendations. Don’t be afraid to go online. With audio and video streaming, a child and tutor can interact almost as well as in person.

There are many great websites like khanacademy.org which provide video instruction for free. These may be helpful for some students. However, there is no substitute for individualized tutoring. If you find that your child needs help, don’t be afraid to seek it out.

Discussion Question – What alternatives do you have for tutoring? Share with other readers!

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In High School, Middle School or Junior High
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Electives That Matter, A Surprising Revelation

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So many to choose from!!

Electives can be a source of confusion. Beyond the “big four” – that is, English, math, science, and social studies – which electives are best for your teen? Should you take foreign language? What about dual-enrollment or AP classes? The literature and movie studies class might be fun. And here is a class for a hobby that I’m interested in. What’s a student to do?

There are usually some required electives. For example, in Alabama a high school graduate must complete at least 8 elective courses to earn their diploma. However, 2.5 to 4.5 of these courses must come from specific areas like arts, health, and physical education. Ultimately, the student only has a handful of elective hours to choose from.

Choosing electives wisely really comes down to the student’s aspirations. A college-bound student will choose differently than a career student. Even college-bound kids might choose differently from one to the other.

Those headed to college definitely need to take foreign language. Most universities require one or two years for full admission. I think foreign language will be valuable to everyone. The global economy and shrinking world almost requires it.

Another choice for college-bound kids is AP courses. Take the class and pass the test at the end of the year, and earn college credit. In some cases, the AP course will replace one of the core classes like English or math. In my son’s instance, he only has AP Calculus as his math choice for his senior year. Because of the college credit, this is a natural fit for college-bound students. To learn more, check out the AP website.

One caution for adding AP electives – there is a lot of work. An AP course will resemble the content and workload of a freshman-level college class. There will be extra homework, reading, and projects. A busy, involved student taking more than one AP course at a time can be overwhelmed.

Electives can also be used to learn a trade. Things like carpentry, auto repair, and electricity are taught as electives. Office education and computer applications courses may appeal to both college and career students. Kids can also learn personal finance, home economics, and other life skills.

Students may also choose a specialty track. Band and choir students generally take arts for all four years. Athletes likely will take strength training or conditioning electives. Even career or vocational kids may take two or three years in their trade.

If all else fails, a student might opt for electives that appeal to their interests. Individual and team sports, photography, journalism, mythology and more are available as electives. Students can also be teacher, library, or office aides. Finally, drama classes are available for would-be thespians.

To make the most out of your electives, begin planning with the freshman year. Some electives are in a series of two or three classes, so you’ll want to take those at the right time. Miss one and you may not have the chance to take it again. Also be aware that some electives have additional fees.

So what are the electives that matter? In short, it depends on the child. No single list will answer that question. Choose what matters to the child. Consider college plans first. Career and work interests come next. Then interests and hobbies should complete the list. Talk with your child to make the best choices.

Discussion Question – What electives do you think are most important for high school students to take? Join the conversation!

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When To Consider Military School?

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Courtesy of USACEpublicaffairs via Creative Commons license.

I watched the movie Act of Valor over the weekend. The movie was about a mission for Navy SEAL Team 7. I won’t spoil the movie for you but I highly recommend this for men of all ages. It depicts bravery, loyalty, toughness, duty, and valor in a way that most Americans will never understand. Women will love it too.

The movie reminded me of the nine years I spent in the United States Coast Guard. I loved every minute of it. My enlistment was a choice. I never planned to go in the service but I am proud that I did. But I never spent a day in military school or in the Junior ROTC in my high school.

So why might a parent choose a military school? The costs can be quite high, averaging more than $10,000 per year. Most of these schools also require on-campus living throughout the school year. Here are a few considerations for military school.

Structure is needed or desired. Some children just need good models for structure and discipline. Because the day is scheduled and structured for the students, this kind of environment can create good habits. Your kids might thrive in an organized, structured environment.

Military service runs strong in the family. Some children may want to continue this family tradition early in life. For the child who aspires to a military career, a military school can be the starting point.

Camaraderie, teamwork, and bonding. When you eat, sleep, and go to school with the same company of cadets you can’t help but build solid relationships. I remember my days in boot camp when we came together as a unit. It’s a feeling that few will experience. It’s also one that will have a lifelong impact on your child.

Excellent college preparation. Many of these schools have above-average entrance exam scores. Each year these military schools send graduates into the top colleges and universities across the nation. These kids have more interaction with their teachers and less interaction with television. On average, they also spend more time doing their homework. Military schools also promote extracurricular and service activities for their cadets.

Surprisingly, military schools are not appropriate for kids with discipline issues. A military school is not setup to provide the support and individualized treatment that these kids need. The in-your-face style of training and instruction doesn’t mix well with behavioral problems. Sending a child with discipline issues to military school will likely make the situation worse.

Parents should never use military school, or any other school, to avoid dealing with their child. Parenting is a difficult job. Life may get in the way sometimes. You cannot run from your parenting obligation or delegate it to someone else.

Military school doesn’t necessarily mean a military career. There is no service obligation for your child for these prep schools. And, some schools have scholarships and financial assistance programs to help with the cost. However, the characteristics and values taught at these schools apply to everyday life. If love of country, patriotism, and honor are high on you and your child’s list, you might consider a high-quality military school.

For more information, visit the Association of Military Colleges and Schools of the United States.

Discussion Question – Did you attend military school? Have you seriously considered it for your child?

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Summer School Is A Good Thing

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Summer school has gotten a bad rap. Back in my day, summer school meant that you didn’t do so well during the school year and had to make up a class or two. For most folks, that’s probably still the way summer school is perceived today. However, there are several compelling reasons to consider summer school activities for your child, and in this post we’ll take a look at some of those.

1) College courses offer a head start on college. Summertime is a great opportunity for your high school junior or senior to pick up a course. Local community colleges and universities have programs for kids this age to get some of their introductory courses out of the way. In addition, summer terms at college are usually a little more relaxed because the number of students on campus is way down. Taking a course in the summer is also a good way to get introduced to the college classroom.

2) High school credit can be earned ahead of its scheduled time. If college classes aren’t your goal, but you want to take advantage of the summer break, then why not use summer school to get an upcoming class completed ahead of time? Any class offered can generally be taken as long as you meet the prerequisites and pay the required fees to attend. This just might get you out of school early during your senior year, or if you play it properly you might even graduate in three years instead of four.

3) Remedial programs aren’t just for those kids who failed a subject. Maybe your son or daughter struggled with the concepts in one class and might benefit from an accelerated approach. Some schools also allow a grade received in summer school to replace a poor grade received during the year, thus boosting your grade point average.

4) Put together you own creative summer school activities at home. Attending summer school can be a pain because of the hours and rigid schedule, plus it costs to attend these classes. Doing it yourself keeps it flexible and allows you to make it fun. Here are four ways to get started:

  • There are so many resources available online for parents to create their own program and help their kids get a step ahead for next year. To find ideas like this, use search topics like “fourth grade worksheets” or “lessons for fourth grade” but tailored to the grade that your child is going into. You can also add specific subject areas to your searches if your child is struggling in a specific area.
  • You could also search for field trip ideas and take your kids on day trips during the summer to experience some of these places.
  • Find a few crafts and tap into your kid’s creative side. The big box stores like Lowes and Home Depot often have free projects on Saturday mornings for kids. And Pinterest and other mom-friendly sites contain thousands of ideas that you might use.
  • Encourage reading through summer library programs. I posted on this last year and my daughter is currently doing this for her third consecutive year. It’s a great way to read without the pressures of study and homework.

Summer school isn’t just for underachievers anymore. Nor is summer school strictly defined as a formal program any longer. If the summer break is used strategically as part of an overall academic plan, students can move ahead of their peers both literally and figuratively. And at home, it’s just a good idea for parents to do some kind of activity during the summer break to keep their kids motivated towards learning.

Application Question: What can you do to keep academics and learning alive for your child during the summer months? Comments are welcome!

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You’ve Got Your Diploma, Now What?

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In the last couple of weeks, high schools across America have graduated the class of 2012. As the tassels were moved to the right side of the cap, thoughts about “what next” drifted through the minds of graduates and their parents alike. In this article, I’ll look at five of the most common scenarios for each year’s graduating class and give some tips that you might not have thought of for each.

An interesting article came out a couple of weeks ago on MSN Careers about what happens after high school. According to the article, fully 68% of all 2011 high school graduates were in college as of October 2011. Among black, white, and Hispanic students, each category averaged between 66% and 67%. However, 86.7% of all Asian students were enrolled in college, speaking to the cultural importance of education among the Asian community. As I build out my list below, I’ll work from what I perceive as the most common scenario to the least common.

You’re going to college in the fall. You’ve been admitted and orientation is just around the corner. Some points of consideration for students in this category revolve around how to pay for college and how to get off to a good start. I recommend enrolling for classes as soon as possible and buying books and required materials in the most economical manner. School-based scholarship deadlines have passed but students should continue to seek other resources like private scholarships to lessen the financial burden for the fall. Begin to look for part-time work; according to the article mentioned above only 38.8% of those in college were working or looking for work.

Not going to college, working instead. There is no shame at all in going straight to the workplace. According to the same article mentioned above, 68.7% of those students who did not continue on to college held some type of job. If you are working at this age, it likely is not the dream job that you someday hope to hold. However, don’t let that deter you; be taking stock of your talents, skills, abilities, personality traits, dreams, and passions and be proactively moving towards a career that matches all of those. Check out these books, both on my Resources page: 48 Days To The Work You Love (for job hunters) or No More Dreaded Mondays (for budding entrepreneurs) both by Dan Miller.

Wanting to go to college but no solid plans. Maybe you didn’t perform as well as you would have liked in high school. Perhaps you were not admitted to your school of choice and gave up at the time, but now you’ve regrouped. Or, the money just isn’t there to go to your number one school. A great solution for those in this situation is to go to a local community college in the fall. The cost is much less than a four-year university and there are programs to ensure that your credits are accepted when you transfer. Please, whatever you do, don’t take out a student loan to cover any deficits. Read this article for reasons why.

Military. An excellent option, this one overlaps the working category. And if you have college plans, the Post 9/11 GI Bill is an AWESOME plan to go to school after you separate. While you are in the military, if you can choose a specialty that lines up with your talents, skills, abilities, personality traits, dreams, and passions, rather than simply taking the recommendation based on your ASVAB scores.

Service and volunteerism. The motivations and intrinsic rewards from service can be excellent, and everyone should be involved at some level in serving others. Especially since you’re giving your time away, choose something that you are passionate about and love doing. Be careful, though, not to hide behind your volunteer roles to avoid moving into the workplace and becoming independent. Reference the same books listed above to find work that fits you.

All in all, in whatever path you choose you are entering a new phase of life. College is certainly an excellent option but is by no means a guarantee of success, so if you aren’t starting in the fall then don’t let that discourage you. In fact, if you aren’t ready for college or don’t yet know what you want to do with your life, then exploring one of the other options will be much better than spending all that money to “find yourself.” Congratulations class of 2012 – go out and change the world!

Application Question – Are you or your new graduate accepting college without a plan? Have you considered the options listed above and the tips associated with each?

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Technology and Kids with The Family Podcast Network

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I had another opportunity this week to be on The Family Podcast Network, Trey Gibson’s excellent show on all issues related to family. We talked about technology and I believe you’ll get some great insight from our chat. Click on the link below to listen and when you’re done take a trip over to Trey’s website and see all of the good things he has over there.

http://thefamilypodcastnetwork.com/kids-and-technology

Please share your comments and thoughts below, share with others if you enjoyed the interview, and be sure to visit the Contact Me page to find out more about our coaching services and offerings.

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Is Corporate Punishment A Common Problem?

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I’m going to go out on a limb and coin a new phrase here – Corporate Punishment. We’ve all heard of corporal punishment as infliction of physical pain in response to an action, but what the heck is corporate punishment? It is a trap that we can easily fall into as parents and teachers because we see it happening all around us. What it is, why it is harmful, and what to do about it are the topics of this post.

Let’s define corporate punishment as the application of the same punishment to a group of individuals. That might be something as simple as putting all of your children in time-out because they’re behaving badly. We see it in schools all the time where the teacher yells at the whole class or makes them all write sentences when in reality only a couple of children are acting up. The first example is clearly OK because all of the children are involved, but the second can be problematic. The children who were not part of the problem suffer a consequence, which sends the wrong message to them about their good behavior.

Corporate punishment can show up in not-so-obvious ways, which is what we observe among adults. I’ve had to catch myself doing this in my workplace. When I come up with a new rule or policy that applies to all of my associates, I have to ask myself is it a reaction to one or two people that is penalizing the group as a whole? Applying corporate punishment in this fashion is generally a method for avoiding conflict with the troublemakers. Sometimes you discover that there is a situation or condition that needs clarification for the group as a whole, but routinely stamping out bad behavior by swatting the whole group destroys morale.

I get it that there are situations where punishing the group as a whole leads to the group applying social correction to the offenders. This might work in a group of adults or in a team environment but generally is not understood by children who are evaluated on their individual performance. I don’t think that corporate punishment is effective in the classroom. When a child is singled out for their behavior it’s tough and may create an uncomfortable conversation with that child’s parents, but if they aren’t made aware of the problem then it never goes away. Corporate punishment may address a specific situation short term, but that situation will happen again and again until the root of the problem is dealt with.

If you’re a parent whose child might be the victim of corporate punishment, follow the general guidelines below to uncover the situation.

  1. Get the facts from your child. Be as specific about dates and punishments as possible.
  2. Don’t discuss your actions with the child; that will undermine their teacher’s authority.
  3. Ask the teacher if your child has been a problem and get specific details to see if the stories line up.
  4. Discuss with the teacher your concerns about what you’ve heard and possible solutions. If you fear retaliation on your child, go to the school principal.
  5. Be a good role model and example of the proper application of discipline in your home.

Teachers specifically, I know you have a very difficult job but no parent wants to hear that their child was unjustly disciplined. I would like to hear your thoughts on corporate punishment. Parents, do you see this happening? Have you had successful interactions with your child’s teachers on this subject?

Application Question – What can I do to recognize corporate punishment? Am I supporting my child’s teachers? Am I guilty of using corporate punishment to avoid conflict?

 

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Why Is It Important To Know Your Child’s Friends?

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Remember when you were a child? You probably started out like the rest of us – your parents were the greatest things on earth and could do no wrong. As you entered school and the world around you, Mom and Dad lost their luster and the cool factor was found in your friends. It’s no different today; at some point your child will value time with their friends more than time with you. But you need to know what to look out for and know about their friends.

The most important thing to know, in my opinion, is that regardless of where you live or what you think, you cannot assume to know anything about what goes on in the homes of your child’s friends. I believe that if your child is going to spend any time in the home of their friends that you know the parents and even accompany your child for the first visit or two. They could be unwittingly exposed to something that can steal their innocence in a split second, and you’re left to deal with the aftermath. You would never trust just anyone with your money, so don’t trust just anyone with your kids. You know the adults that you like and trust, so you can steer your child to spend time with the children of those families.

Part of your child’s natural development is to absorb input and information from their surroundings and begin to develop ideas and opinions of their own. Normally, this is a healthy behavior if the right inputs are being absorbed. But children pick up on things from one another, and a friend who has differing values, religious views, morals and beliefs from yours can easily convince your child to see things in a way that you would not approve of. I’m not saying that you should brainwash your kids and turn them into little versions of yourself. However, knowing who they are hanging out with and where their influences are coming from should play a big part in your decisions about who they associate with.

Your kids are naturally curious, and sometimes their friends are eager to provide them with answers. While sometimes the answers will be technically correct, other times they will be very wrong. Whether right or wrong, you may not want your child exposed to this information from another child and maybe not at this particular stage in life. Knowing their friends can give you some idea of the types of conversations they have and whether you may need to intervene.

Beginning around the tween years, peer pressure begins to kick in. Your child’s desires to fit in may lead them to do things that their so-called friends cajole them into. Knowing your child’s friends can keep you on the lookout for this type of behavior and help you talk to your child about peer pressure.

To summarize, the steps you can take towards knowing that your child’s friends are a good influence are:

  • Target who you want your child to befriend
  • Know their parents
  • Visit with their parents
  • Observe your child with their friends in supervised play
  • Ask your child questions and answer their questions
  • Build your child’s self-esteem and they won’t seek it from others
  • Set clear expectations for your child
  • Let them see your moral code in action
  • When something feels wrong, it probably is – act on your child’s behalf

Outside of the home, nothing influences your child more than the interactions with their friends. During the school year, they spend as much waking time with their friends each day as they do at home, so it is important to know who they’re hanging out with. By intentionally guiding your child through the development of their friendships, you set them up for success in the development of their adult relationships.

Some other articles you might like on this topic:

The Buddy System: Are Your Child’s Friends a “Positive  Influence”?

Getting To Know Your Child’s Friends

When you dislike your kid’s friends

And related posts that I’ve written:

Go with the flow or hold steady?

Why Is Peer Pressure So Powerful on Teens

Does Your Teen Need a Curfew? Seven Reasons I Say Yes!

Computers and children

Chime in with your comments below or share if you like this post!

Application Question – Am I involved enough in my child’s interactions with their friends?

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Why is Grade Point Average So Important?

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So in our last posting we talked about grade point averages (GPA) and how to calculate them.  In this posting I’ll talk about why I spent so much time to make sure that everyone understands how they are calculated.  The merit scholarship, by and large, is awarded based on a combination of your GPA and your best college entrance exam score.  The higher each of these are, the more you are eligible to receive.  However, one or the other is usually not enough to save you if the other is not good.  The exam score generally measures aptitude to perform well at college-level courses while the GPA shows the amount of discipline and good study habits; in other words, it is a measure of just how serious you are about school.  Scholarship award committees take a huge risk when they award a full-tuition scholarship to a student, and they want to be sure that they are making a sound investment.

Starting in middle school, parents and students alike can work to develop this discipline and study regime that prepares the student for the challenges of high school.  I have always told my kids as they approached high school that “this is where it all counts”.  It is so much easier to start out with a high GPA and remain there than it is to crawl your way back up.  One year of 3.0 GPA must be accompanied by a year of 4.0 GPA to balance out to a 3.5 average.  Many of the state schools use 3.75 as their top-level benchmark for the GPA side of the merit scholarship equation, ranging down to 3.25 and occasionally as low as 3.0.  These lower numbers will be rewarded at a lower level.

As you begin to apply to colleges during your junior year, you will be asked to submit an academic transcript.  Your high school GPA at that time will be used to (a) determine your admission status and (b) determine your eligibility for merit scholarships.  This is not the time to ease off, however; all colleges require a final transcript as a condition of enrollment.  Colleges have pulled previously-offered scholarships when a student’s GPA falls below the set criteria, so it is extremely important to follow through till the end.  My oldest child, for example, was #2 in his high school class up till the very last semester.  He played through till the end and moved into the #1 position of class rank, which qualified him for an additional $2000 from the college that he ultimately attended.  While not everyone can be top of their class, this is an illustration of how important GPA can be in factoring the amount of scholarship money made available to you.  Students and parents, let’s work together to polish that GPA and keep it as high as possible!

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Know Before You Go – Calculating Your Grade Point Average

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As mentioned in the last blog post, merit scholarships are non-competitive awards that schools make available to the highest-achieving students.  Typically, two components make up the merit scholarship award criteria – standardized test scores using the ACT or SAT and grade-point average (GPA).  Today we’ll focus on GPA.  To ensure that all readers understand what GPA refers to, I’ll briefly explain.  GPA is a mathematical calculation of the summary of a student’s grades.  It is calculated by assigning a numerical value to each letter grade, adding up all of the numerical values and dividing by the number of grades in the calculation.  Usually, the following table is used in assigning numerical values to a letter grade:

A = 4 points
B = 3 points
C = 2 points
D = 1 point
F = 0 points

So, as an example, let’s say that little Johnny brings home the following on his progress report:

English – B
Algebra – C
Science – A
History – B
Music – A
Phys Ed – B

Using the values given above, you would calculate Johnny’s GPA as follows:

3+2+4+3+4+3 = 19 divided by 6 = 3.16 GPA

High schools and colleges calculate an overall GPA for all classes attempted.  In most high schools, this simple calculation above would accurately reflect the GPA because one class equals one credit.  However, for colleges, another component is added.  Because college courses can have different credit hours earned, another step is factored into the calculation to include the credit hours per course.  The numeric value assigned to the letter grade for a class is multiplied by the number of credit hours to determine what is typically called the number of quality points for that class.  All of the quality points earned in a semester are added up, but instead of dividing by the number of classes taken you divide by the number of credit hours attempted.  Note that I said attempted, not just passed – most colleges calculate every attempt at a class. This becomes important if you have to pass a class with a C or better to move to the next class in sequence but only get a D this time around – you’ll have to take it again in order to move forward and both attempts will factor into your GPA and cost you tuition dollars.  Another example is shown below for college students:

English 101 (3 hours) – A
Pre-Calculus (3 hours) – B
Psych 101 (2 hours) – B
Biology (4 hours) – C
Biology Lab (1 hour) – A

The calculation for this college freshman would be as follows:

(4×3)+(3×3)+(3×2)+(2×4)+(4×1) = 39 divided by 13 = 3.00 GPA

Hopefully this gives you a little understanding as to what is involved with the GPA calculation.  As GPA is one of the major components of determining scholarship eligibility, both parents and students need to be aware of this number, how it is calculated, and more importantly how it is used in the admissions and scholarship awards process.  In the interest of time I won’t perform any additional calculations, but parents sit down with your students and show them how their GPA is calculated.  It might be beneficial to show them what happens when one or two C’s or D’s sneak into the mix and how hard it becomes to recover from a bout of laziness.  Start fast with a high GPA and keep it there!

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